Cohabitation before marriage was once considered taboo, but over time it has become more common and accepted. If you are in a relationship with your partner and things are going well, you may consider living together.
Moving in with your partner is an important step that means a significant development in your relationship.
This article explores the factors to consider when deciding whether to live with your partner before marriage, and the potential benefits and drawbacks of this arrangement.
Factors to consider
Below is a list of some factors to consider when deciding whether to live with your partner before marriage.
Reason for wanting to live together
The first thing to consider is your motivation for living with your partner. Partners who live together for financial reasons or to test their relationship may not be satisfied with their decision in the long run, and may even end up not getting married.
This is in contrast to couples who decide to move in together out of a genuine desire to spend more time together and slowly integrate their lives. You probably want to know more about the other person and develop the relationship.
Remember the importance of choosing someone because you want to be with them, and don't make decisions based on fear or convenience.
your age and life stage
Age and life stage are also important considerations. Before taking this step, you may want to give each partner space to live on their own or with friends, allowing each partner to experience a variety of independent and social life before committing to living together. It would be effective.
When people experience such a variety of lifestyles, they tend to appreciate their partners more and feel less unsatisfied with what their peers are experiencing.
conversation with partner
It is important to make a conscious decision to live together, rather than just starting to live together casually. Because if you slip into cohabitation, you'll be avoiding important decisions and conversations, which could lead to bigger problems down the road.
For example, you may gradually find yourself spending more time in one of your homes and decide it makes sense to live together for convenience or financial reasons. They may consider marriage because they have been together for a long time and have already invested a lot of time into their partner, thinking that they may never find someone else.
Rather, it's important to make a conscious decision to live together and discuss financial arrangements, who keeps what, how space will be allocated, etc. with your partner, incorporating each other's values and beliefs.
Implications of cohabitation before marriage
Living with your partner can have a big impact on your relationship. Below is an overview.
Increased commitment
Before you move in, there are more opportunities to evacuate. If you fight, get irritated, or are unhappy with each other, you can always return to your space.
Living together means committing to the relationship, both good and bad. You all promise to stick together, through good days and bad.
Increase in investment amount
Living together means investing in a more substantial relationship. The next step after cohabitation is usually a formal commitment, such as marriage, or, if things don't work out, separation.
Breaking up after living together is quite complicated because you have to separate your lives, which tend to be complicated.
Improving trust
Living together also means making a promise to show each other parts of yourself that have been hidden until now. You run the risk of becoming vulnerable and exposing all your little rituals and eccentric habits.
Knowing these aspects, you need to trust your partner and make this promise, confident that your relationship will not only survive, but become even stronger.
merit and demerit
Here we will introduce the advantages and disadvantages that people who decide to live together before marriage often experience.
Advantages of living together before marriage
The benefit of living together before marriage is that it's an opportunity to learn how to navigate life together without the internal and external pressures that come with marriage.
For many people, marriage represents a commitment that cannot easily be undone. The weight that comes with that commitment, especially from family and friends, can distort the problems and conflicts that can arise in relationships.
The benefits of living together before marriage are that you get to know each other better, strengthen your joint problem-solving ability, strengthen your relationship and ability to overcome stressors, and feel more confident in your decision to marry. is what you can do.
Disadvantages of living together before marriage
The disadvantage of cohabiting before marriage is that it tends to weaken the commitment between the couple and lead to dissatisfaction with the marriage.
People who decide to live together may have different expectations than their partner about moving. One partner may have more unconventional ideas about marriage and be happy with this arrangement, or the other partner may expect marriage to follow this step.
It is important to consider the implications of the move for each partner, especially if the move is motivated as a way to postpone commitment to one partner. And that meaning should be communicated to and by each partner.
Additionally, the standards for cohabitation are usually lower than those for marriage, and some people may regret the time and energy they spent on cohabitation if it does not ultimately lead to marriage.
in conclusion
If you are starting to think about living together before marriage with someone you have had a successful relationship with, be sure to confirm their motives before moving in. What you need is a genuine desire to spend more time with the other person, to know more about them, and an open mind to expose yourself to the other person.
Also, before moving in, it is important to discuss important aspects of your relationship, such as finances, responsibilities, and expectations for the future, and to agree on moving in.
